I have seen, and I cannot be the same. . .
We were blessed by all the prayers for health and safety and the unity of a wonderful team. My kids were beyond safe and well taken care of by my wonderful parents-in-love! We were free to give our full attention and all our energy the entire 8 days, holding nothing back! Thank you Jesus!!
I boarded that plane not knowing exactly how I would be stretched in my physical body, but never really considering the emotional and spiritual stretching that this trip would be. Haiti was extremely hot with little relief during the day.We traveled to the villages and walked the dusty red roads and hillsides. We rode in a cramped SUV on unpaved, potholed laden roads with sweaty team members.We visited orphanages and schools, to sing and perform skits and play games. I was not prepared for what my eyes would encounter, let alone what my mind could process. Most of the time I kept pinching myself, I felt that I had walked onto the pages of a Compassion International magazine, it didn't even seem real.
Painting homes and digging ditches in the heat was beyond what I would have ever thought I could physically do. Witnessing the joy on a Mother's face filled with gratitude for a home we roofed and painted. They would be the first family in the village,still ravaged from the earthquake 3 years ago, to have a real home. She had been living in a tarp make-shift shack, the size of my laundry room, with her 4 children.
Then, just next door to her and over the hill more families begging for a home for their family too. Would I not beg with the same desperation for my own children. . .I don't even think twice about where/if I will have a place of safety and comfort to sleep each night.
Tears ran down my face from exhaustion, holding another child on my lap desperate for the simple act of physical touch from a mother or father. How can I look into those eyes and not have my heart run liquid down my face. Praying for a woman dying of breast cancer, lying in her bed writhing in pain from having her breast removed and sent on her way with no pain medication. Her body now ravaged with tumors and infection. Kissing her face, reading Psalm 103 over her sweaty body. . ."He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He ransoms me from death and surrounds me with love and tender mercies". . . with flies buzzing around her as I hold onto the wall near me afraid I will collapse right there on the floor. Oh God, are you really enough? Are you good?. . .all the time? Do I trust your character? Sweet Jesus, I had nothing to give, no medicine to dull the physical pain, no Mother for the four sweet children she may leave to care for themselves, not even enough bread to feed the hungry village children that would follow us around.
As I bent down to look into eyes, touch the sick and sit in the dust and dirt with them, I heard in my spirit, "DeAnne, you are touching with my hands, kissing with my lips, and holding with my arms. . ."Whatever you do unto the least of these, you are doing unto Me." (Matt 25:40) Can I really have nothing to give, yet have all I need to give in a place like Haiti? I kept thinking of the story told of the man who was on a beach tossing sand dollars into the water to save them from the hot noonday sun. He is asked by a passer by "Why bother?" The task is too great, it could never matter to spend his time doing such a daunting, never ending task. To which he answered,"It matters to this one", as he tossed it into the sea.
The poverty in Haiti is overwhelming and it's just a small half island in the Caribbean. Can we build a home for all those sleeping in tents? No, but we can help one. We can say YES to what the Lord is asking of us, even if we think we have nothing, we truly have everything. My favorite blogger and author went to Haiti and then wrote these words, my heart echos with these thoughts as I return to my comfortable life in Franklin, TN.
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Once we have seen the poor, we are responsible — we will make a response. As long as your heart is beating, there’s no such thing as unresponsive. We all look into the face of the poor and it’s either Yes, I will help. Or no, I won’t.
There’s no getting off the hook.
Faith cannot have a non-response.
We’re either responding with indifference or with intercession, either with apathy or aid.
You can’t look into the face of the poor and just plead the fifth amendment. Your life is always your answer.
